Alone like a bird on a roof

Keng Ga, Vietnam

“I lie awake; I have become like a bird alone on a roof.” Psalm 102:7

My life has emptied of people — through divorce, sickness and death.  Friendships have fallen away.  I looked around and they were all gone — these humans in whom I put so much trust and hope.  I looked to them to define me, to make myself feel good about myself and even to show the world that I was “okay” because I had relationships and a “support system” in my life and that I was loved .

But these relationships vanished leaving me like a bird alone on a roof.

Relying on people is like relying on vapor.  My hope in people was smashed to smithereens because I learned they were just like me — broken.  They couldn’t love me unconditionally, they couldn’t heal my wounds, they couldn’t replace my insecurity with security, they couldn’t give me a hope and a peace for my future.

But God could.  “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

And I God did these things when I believed him.

Now, when I sit alone, like a bird on a roof, I am not alone and I am not broken.  I am with the Holy Spirit.  I am not distressed by my aloneness and the lack of people in my life for I have found companionship with God.

Alone, I see more clearly. I see the painful mistakes of my life and how they, through the forgiveness and healing of Jesus, have drawn me into a deepness with you, O God.

Alone, I am free to have my thoughts inhabited by you, O God.  You fill me with your wisdom, your knowledge and your secrets.  You give me understanding.

Alone, I know you know every hair on my head and every breath I take.  I know I bring great joy to your heart and that you are pleased by your creation of me.  You see past my sin — having forgiven every one of them and casting them into your great sea of forgetfulness.  You see what I will become.  You have replaced my insecurity with security in you, O God.

Alone, I see you — the possibilities of my alliance with and reliance on you.  Through your word I learn about your plans and desires for my life and how you want my life to encourage others.

Alone, I see I have strength and courage — my encouragement come from you, O God.

Encouragement not to live a static and apathetic life.

Encouragement not to live a life full of idol worship — of people, relationships, wealth, position and of my own physical appearance.

Encouragement to live for you, O God, who has taken my life and made it true, dependent on you but through you, I am able to do all things you purpose for me.

Alone, but not lonely, for you, O God, live in my heart and will be with me always.

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