“Let my cry come near before thee, O LORD: give me understanding according to thy word.” Psalm 119:169
Let my cry come before you. A cry that results from knowing that you, O Lord, are the only one who understands me and knows what I need. All my decisions have been fraught with my own insecurities and selfish goals. They amount to nothing. I must come to the end of myself to truly serve you and walk in and manifest out your love for this world.
I desparately need understanding from your word to live out my life. I need my own thinking and perceptions to be stripped away, replaced with your wisdom. I need to be righteous through you in my approach to the world — my relationships and enviornment. Your word teaches me.
“Let my supplication come before thee: deliver me according to thy word.” 170
My requests must be in line with your word. Help to to seek out your word that is applicable to my current situation. Deliver me from strongholds that have kept me in captivity and that have prevented me from fully walking in righteousness, peace and joy.
“My lips shall utter praise, when thou hast taught me thy statutes. ” 171
I have already experienced your deliverance in my life and it is of these times that I think of when I need your help. My heart praises you and loves you because you first loved me and have been my salvation. You have brought me freedom! Your word teaches me your way of doing and being and is a sure and secure path.
“My tongue shall speak of thy word: for all thy commandments are righteousness.” 172
My tongue shall speak your word and my mind shall continually meditate on your word as it leads me to you and your righteousness. Help me to remember your word and bring it to my memory in the situations that I need it most. Give me a fierce hunger and desire for your word and a desparate desire to know you. It is through your word that I know you — your statutes and commands and your desires for my own life.
“Let thine hand help me; for I have chosen thy precepts.” 173
I depend on you for help! I have found that I can do nothing without you. You are truth and bring light to every circumstance. I pray your hand would uphold meand guide me in every situation.
I have chosen your precepts. I don’t want to live out my life by my own understanding — doing that which has only brought me death and destruction.
“I have longed for thy salvation, O LORD; and thy law is my delight. ” 174
I can only be truly free as I rely on you. Your law is my delight because it shows me how often I fail if I don’t choose you. Every decision I have made in my own personal understanding has led to falseness, destruction and even death. Every decision I have made with you and for you has led to life and freedom.
“Let my soul live, and it shall praise thee; and let thy judgments help me.” 175
My soul and all that I am, my life and vitality, is only truly alive through knowing you. Your word has proved itself over and over — saving me from ruin and sin.
“I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments.” 176
Even now, I do things and make decisions in my own understanding … even when I do think that I’ve prayed about it and sought your word. I have often looked for “fleece” as some kind of sign to move forward with an action or decision only to have the situation not turn out. I find myself constantly moving forward two steps then having to frequently step backward into your path. Each time you teach me something in the situation which makes me so thankful. I know this, I must live by your word alone and not by circumstances.